Taste of Vengeance

I dare not to say some nasty stuffs anymore because my beloved mom's had asked me not to before she went to perform her Umra' few days ago. So, I'm in a midst of controlling myself not to lash out, not to curse or even not to hold a grudge towards etc etc. Having said all that, I feel that my life is pretty much heading to a correct path; much better than what I've become. You (yes!! You readers) don't have any idea what I have gone through these few weeks ago, how miserable & pathetic my life had become,just because I desired those things that I truly wanted to make it as my own belonging. But some irresponsible parties had made my desire turned dead. They have thrown away my desire. My dream was nothing to them even though they knew how important for me to get that thing. I was one step closer to own that thing. It was so close; as close as two people could get. But when I think about it over and over again, I realize it was a matter of 'rezki'. Sometimes no matter how hard we try, IF there's no 'rezki', we won't get what we want. I was devastated at first and keep blaming everyone's who had involved; especially the parties that I've mentioned earlier. If only they could tell me earlier about my status, this thing had never be done and I didn't have to put my expectation too high. Despite of all these learning experience, I knew that HE just wanted to test my patience and see how I handle my life throughout these obstacles. And thank to HIM, HE IS THE GREATEST know that I know what is the sweetness behind all these bitterness. I've remembered what HE had quoted in Surah Al- Insyirah. And silly me not to realize that everything that happens must have it reasons. During these obstacles, I have also received a very good news. But since it is still early to announce it over here, I'd ask for everyone's apology to let me reserve the news.

I'm now in the middle of waiting for my dream to come true. This time there is no more 3rd parties involve. Just me and me and me and me and me.........Wish me luck!